Friday 7 July 2017

JAM Dodgers - part 1



Theresa May still says "we all have to live within our means".




But that just means that she means that she's going to be mean, and that only she can use the money from her secret magic money tree... 




"Hello, I'd like to exchange these magic notes into 10 votes please, I'm going to buy myself some extra time" she explained. "Well, the exchange rate isn't very good, are you sure?" asked the man behind the desk. She was surer than ever and invited her new friends to attend her Nasty Party.



Meanwhile, there was far too much JAM ('Just About Managing' - Theresa's acronym, not mine) in the UK. Theresa May even took some to the States, "I made this!" she exclaimed to the First Lady.



Ed Balls now had to dance to make a living. Things were looking bleak for society. And televised entertainment.




Only David Cameron and George 'Revenge' Osbourne were still riding high on the waves of Austerity. "They're all just selfish," shouted Cameron.  George 'Revenge' Osbourne had a smug look on his face - he had more jobs than most people earned pounds per hour. 




But then something completely unexpected happened - the JAM began to grow larger and angrier, quickly spreading towards the Nasty Party. Meanwhile, Amber Rudd was still trying to come to terms with the truth about the magic money tree. Reality can be hard sometimes.




The Nasty Party suddenly became aware of the imminent danger they were in. Theresa May remained strong and stable - quickly swinging into action to reveal an escape route she had planned as a naughty child.

But... Will it be enough? Just how many fields did she run through - will the naughty minx be able lead the Nasty Party out of danger? Will Amber Rudd come back to reality in time to dodge the encroaching JAM and escape? 

Maybe we'll find out some other time...

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